Attitude of Gratitude

Westergasfabriek in Amsterdam

Quite often I sit and think a while about what I’m going to write in my post before actually writing it. I guess everyone does that. But I’ve noticed that my thoughts have to percolate a while before I can actually put pen to paper and write something vaguely meaningful.

I’ve been reminded recently of why I even started writing this blog. As I’ve said in the past, I travel quite a bit and live abroad so there is usually a wealth of material right at my fingertips (especially being amongst the Dutch!!) But I have been feeling drawn to getting back to the theme of gratitude and expressing my appreciation for all I am lucky enough have.

Recently I’ve been thinking about how each one of us has the power to make whatever life we want. Each day I receive messages from the universe with inspirational sayings about how your thoughts become things, so you should choose the good ones. I wholeheartedly believe this and think it affects all parts of your life.

Today’s message is:

“Usually, it's not thinking about the bucks, Dawn, that makes one rich.
But thinking rich, that makes the bucks.
If you know what I mean.
Strut -
The Universe"

I believe this attitude relates to sickness as well. I generally think that our minds have ultimate control over our bodies, and that when I get sick it is a physical manifestation of some kind of emotional issue I haven’t yet dealt with. And usually when I face whatever issue I’m having, my illness will quickly go away. Yes, I admit it is a little woowoo, but I believe it.

I am not saying that people with serious diseases like cancer can cure it by having good thoughts or that I don’t go to the doctor because I believe in mind over matter. That isn’t my point at all. I am just saying that I think that general positive thinking keeps you healthy and in good spirits. And I also think that when I get a sore throat I generally wonder what I’m not expressing that needs to be communicated so my throat will get better!

Anywho, I believe with our thoughts we can dream and ultimately create the ideal life that we want. And when I dream big, I write, journal, make lists, and collect notes of what I want and watch my dreams become my reality.

To illustrate, at the beginning of each year I have the tradition of writing a list of goals for that year. The items on the list can be as simple as doing more yoga or my holiday plans to more substantial things like changing career or moving to another country. At the end of the year, I then check against what I actually accomplished over that year. I find that just by writing them down they are much more likely to come true. And I find that even by just thinking about my goals, they are more likely to happen. I truly believe our minds have amazing power.

I’m writing all this out because I am about to dream BIG. Recently, I’ve been having this feeling that big changes are near on my horizon. That I’m closing out a chapter of my life that is complete. And that my life is about to take a dramatic turn for the better. In order to shape those changes to make my perfect life, I need to explore what my life currently lacks, what I want for myself, and what I want to change. And then I will watch it all unfold before me.

And who knows, maybe I’ll share some of my dreams with you.

This weekend one of my American friends accused me of disliking all things Dutch. He based this on me not wanting to eat two slices of bread with one slab of dry cheese for lunch every day, which is a typical noontime Dutch meal. I told him that really was not a fair assessment and that there were only a few special habits that really irk me about some of the Dutch.

The first is the Dutch service, or rather, lack of service. It is definitely not their forte, as they will rightly admit. Right after accusing me, we walked to a café for a coffee and low and behold sat there unnoticed for at least 10 minutes in a nearly empty room. Only after signaling a waiter did we actually get served. And would it hurt too much to crack an occasional smile and be friendly? Sometimes they look at you like it is a huge inconvenience to have to deal with the likes of me and my coffee. God forbid I order something custom off the menu! This doesn't seem to be an unusual occurrence because the Dutch get paid a normal wage for service oriented jobs and therefore have no incentive to put in any extra effort and work for a tip.

Another annoying tendency, which I find downright rude, is that sometimes they push past you on the street or in a shop without saying “excuse me”. That drives me absolutely insane. And the shocking thing is that it doesn’t just happen with people on foot. Just this weekend I was hit TWICE walking down the street, minding my own business, by people riding their bikes down the road. Now tell me, how is that even possible??? I find the lack of acknowledgement for slamming into someone totally inexcusable.

At a high level those two items - sometimes coming across unfriendly or rude - really cover what bothers me.

So, since my goal is to have gratitude in all I do, I thought I could adjust my attitude and view these differently to sound more positive. :-)

Therefore regarding Dutch service, I chalk it all up to a different culture and not meant to come across as rude. Or, perhaps they are having a bad day, don’t speak great English, or hate Americans (I'm kidding!). The funny thing is that Americans are often considered rude because of how they request things and expect American quality service in a restaurant!

The flip side to only being helped when asked in restaurants is that you can literally sit at a restaurant all day and never feel rushed and like they are trying to turn a table. And on top of that you don’t have to tip the extra 20% you do in the USA. Now, that is wonderful!

As for those people hitting me on their bikes, well… I have a special treat for them! I have a long stick waiting for the next time it happens that will slip directly into the spokes of their front wheel and we’ll see what kind of excitement happens next! Oh wait, that isn’t very positive, is it?

Okay then, the only thing I can think is that when you have 17 million people squashed into a country approximately the size of Maryland (10th smallest US state) you treasure your privacy and personal space and don’t necessarily feel the need to apologize for every small infraction. That fact makes the Netherlands one of the most densely populated countries in the world. Not that this is a great excuse, but it is the only thing I can imagine.

But I gotta to tell you, these minor irritations fade away when you take a look at the magnificence that surrounds you. When I travel other places, I often think how much more gorgeous Amsterdam is by comparison. And that, ladies and gentlemen, makes all right in the world. And now, I will go back to my stroopwafels and muntthee. Lekker!

My Stargazer Lily

My favorite flower is the stargazer lily. I am moved by the rich pink center that emanates out eventually into pinkish red spots at the tips. And I love their slightly sweet and subtle aroma that can fill an entire room. In fact, their scent is how my love of stargazers began…

Many years ago during one of my first jobs, I was sent to Seattle to attend my first conference. It was the first of many trips for work. The first of nice hotel rooms. The first of business class. The first of per diems. The first of new cities.

I stayed there at the Westin, on the forty-something floor which has incredible panoramic views over the entire city. It is perfectly located near the Pike Place Market, where they throw slippery fish around while yelling at each other at the top of their lungs. I ate at the finest seafood restaurants – all paid for by work – I was so excited! And I went to my super dorky conference.

At said super dorky conference, I networked (gathered business cards), attended seminars (took notes), perused booths (got freebies), and attended key notes (set my beeper to stun). I must have looked a little lost (or possibly like I was too young to be there), because one day a man at the conference came up and we struck up a conversation. He took me under his wing and showed me the ropes, plus had a great sense of humor. By the end of the week we were great friends (and still are).

Near the end of the week, I ran back to the hotel during lunchtime. My first thought when I entered the room is how wonderful it smelled, and how my fragrant perfume must have lingered for the several hours I was gone. And if you put two and two together, really I was thinking at how fabulous I must smell!

As I walked further into the room, however, I saw a huge bouquet of at least two dozen stargazer lilies, all in full bloom. It was an incredible site to see, and – another first – the first time I’d received dozens of stargazer lilies from a man at a conference in Seattle. And it was a little shocking… first because that incredible smell wasn’t me! and second because it was the first time I’d received dozens of stargazer lilies from a man at a conference in Seattle.

All of this is to say that today I’m grateful for stargazer lilies. I cannot help but enjoy them because at this moment their lovely scent is filling my Amsterdam apartment and flooding me with wonderful memories of that innocent time in my career. Ah, the sweet memories….

Indian Bry and Pilgrim Dawn - 2006

Thanksgiving in Holland does not exist. For expats who want to celebrate, you typically must go to an event organized by an expat organization or get together with friends and plan a feast of your own. But turkeys are not readily available in the Netherlands so what do you do? Well, some butchers here will sell turkeys but you must order them well in advance. Apparently they only fatten up and sell turkeys to the expats, specifically for the holidays! This year we ordered a 4.5 kilo turkey for a group of 10 American friends.

Of course, you can’t get things like stuffing mix, pie crusts, pumpkin filling, or cranberries in the shops here either. We therefore have to go to the incredibly overpriced expat shop and purchase them. Again, you have to do this in advance or you won’t be able to find them anywhere in the city.

When I first moved here I made a pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving – having purchase pumpkin pie filling and the graham cracker pie crust at the wildly expensive expat specialty store – and my friend Steph dropped by to pick it up. I had just closed the door when I heard a monstrous thump outside. Apparently as Steph was carefully maneuvering down my curved and deathly steep stairs she tripped and dropped the pie on the floor. After checking to see if she was okay, I started scooping the pie up to throw away and cleaning up.

If the same thing happened today, I would be down on my hands and knees figuring out a way to carefully save that pie! After living here for years, you begin to miss the things from home and a pie splattered all over the bottom of the stairs will not stop you from somehow finding a way to salvage the good parts at all costs!

Ho hum… I didn’t realize until I started writing this that I’m feeling a little homesick. I’m reminded about how my entire family – parents, sister, brother, nieces and nephews – will all be out on 50 acres of land enjoying a big dinner with mom’s terrible stuffing, riding motorcycles/three-wheelers, tractors, and fishing. And how Thanksgiving really kicks off the beginning of the holiday season in the USA. All of that makes me feel a bit lonely here today. I don’t think anyone from back home can really relate to how it feels to be so far away during the holidays. :-( It ain’t all glitzy travel and glamour!

But, I’m reminded that Thanksgiving is a time to feeling gratitude for all you have. And today I’m thankful for this: I have the world’s greatest friends here to share the good times (and the lonely times) on this Thanksgiving! Happy Turkey Day to everyone out there!

Riding around in zero degree weather on my bike searching for toilet paper makes me really unhappy!! And never finding any is even worse!

Last weekend I became intimately familiar with the bathroom ceiling at the Orlando Airport. Right when I flew into Florida I had a bloody nose that refused to clot. It was all kinds of gross…

The reason I had the bloody nose is because I spent the weekend in the very dry, heated air in Boston, Massachusetts. There is no time like the present to tell you that after three years of living in lovely A’dam that I’ll be moving back to Boston in March. Moving to Europe has been such a positive experience on so many different levels that it really makes me sad to now contemplate leaving.

No time now to reminisce, but I thought I’d at least let the world know. Anyone got friends in Boston?? And meanwhile, I’m spending a few weeks in Orlando for work, at the Portofino Bay resort right near Universal Studios. More soon!

Okay, it’s official… I’m freaked out! I bought my ticket to move to Boston last Friday. I leave A’dam on Friday, March 28th. I have an appointment with an apartment finder on Saturday, March 29th at 10AM. I figure – why wait? But I do have a hotel for two weeks, just in case!

I don’t know what my problem is, but I feel completely overwhelmed. Suddenly I question why I’m leaving here when things are just getting warmer and people have started smiling again and there are so many cool places nearby. And I don’t really have to do anything myself. My company pays for the packing and moving of my stuff. Yes, even the packing. I literally just have to open the door and point to what is mine.

But I’ve been trying to weed through all the stuff I came over with three years ago and all the stuff I’ve accumulated since and get rid of what isn’t needed. And you’d be surprised about what isn’t needed. All that stuff I kept and never used is finally being thrown out. I’ve already gotten rid of several bags of clothes and knick-knacks. I was thinking of throwing out the pink wig but thought better of it! ;-)

So, yes, I’m feeling like a deer in the headlights. Unable to actually function and get anything done. Instead of planning for my departure I sit around and play around on the computer, doing absolutely nothing, or stare blankly at the TV. It is amazing how much time you can waste doing nothing. Meanwhile, I sit looking at a cluttered apartment feeling very anxious.

Breathe in, breathe out. I got a foot massage yesterday at the local Chinese massage place to try to relax. 20 Euros for 30 minutes. SO worth every euro cent!

And today I fly to Portugal for work. Back on Wednesday. Back out to Turkey for the weekend with a friend. Then, the next weekend, my big blowout goodbye party. My friends from Germany are coming and I’m psyched about that. Maybe if I wasn’t always on the road I wouldn’t feel so overwhelmed. Or maybe not.

Dear Anna,

Flat Stanley arrived in Amsterdam after a long ride on an airplane and he was really, really flat! Amsterdam is a very nice, old city in the very small country of Holland (also called The Netherlands). It has a lot of pretty canals filled with water right in the middle of the city. It rains a lot here which fills the canals. Flat Stanley enjoyed riding with me on my bike to work each morning. A lot of people here do not have cars because there is not enough space for them. It is not big like Texas here! There are more people living in Texas (approximately 25 million) than there are in Holland (17 million).

I work on the most famous square in Amsterdam, Holland called The Dam. When I look out my window I see the Palace where the Queen of Holland is sometimes!! Flat Stanley loved the view.

Flat Stanley in front of the palace on Dam Square

Flat Stanley got to travel to Lisbon, Portugal with me. I had to go there for work. I think Flat Stanley liked it there because it is in Southern Europe and a lot warmer – like Texas! He was really excited because he got to go swimming with a really big lobster!! He also liked the airport and riding in the airplane and reading the magazine. It was in Portuguese AND English!

Flat Stanley swimming with big lobster

Flat Stanley hangin' at the airport

Flat Stanley reading magazines on the airplane

For the weekend, Flat Stanley flew with me to Bodrum in Turkey. Turkey is to the east of Holland and is also a lot warmer. He liked it there because he could hang out on the beaches and go see lots of different boats. It looks different from Galveston, doesn’t it? He also got to eat interesting foods there, like shawarma, which is Middle Eastern fast food.

Flat Stanley lovin' Turkey

While we were in Turkey, we saw a Flat Stephanie with another woman! Flat Stanley liked meeting Flat Stephanie.

Flat Stanley helped me pack up all my stuff to move back to the USA. Now I live in Boston, but Flat Stanley is back on his way to Texas and didn’t get to see Boston. I think he was sad about that but happy he got to see so many different countries in Europe. He is excited to head home and see Anna.

Love,
Dawn

Introspection in A'dam

I moved to Boston about a month ago now, but last week I returned back to A’dam for work. I met up with another repatriated expat friend of mine who used to live in China and he asked if I had any RCS stories yet. That same friend had been over in A’dam about a month before I moved back to the USA and warmed me that I should be prepared for this, drum roll please – the dreaded “Reverse Culture Shock” or RCS.

We had been to dinner when he was over before I moved and he listened to me basically talk stream of consciousness for about three hours about my concern about leaving the Netherlands– how I loved the people I’d met, the culture, riding my bike everywhere, the green, simple life I had there and I how I was questioning my decision to leave.

He responded by telling me that no matter what you expect about moving back home, he was surprised by the reverse culture shock he felt since moving back to the USA and how in two years he still hasn’t fully re-acclimated into the society. It sounds somewhat obvious, but he explained that when you move abroad you are very open minded about everything because you expect that everything is going to be completely different with a different language, cultural differences, etc. So the reverse comes as a shock when you move back after being away – you know what to expect here and suddenly those things that should make you feel welcomed back home quickly get on your nerves and you miss all those things from your expat life. But you always think – that won’t happen to me…

So when I saw him and he asked if I had any RCS stories since living in Boston, I quickly responded that it had been too short a time, only a few weeks, when in that exact moment I thought of my first one:

In the three years I spent in the Netherlands I have spent countless hours complaining about the lack of service, quickly followed with a diatribe of how in the fabulous USA everyone is so service oriented and how pleasant it was to experience instead of being met with the scowling faces of the Dutch waitresses from the moment you walk into a restaurant.

I can barely believe that I am saying what I’m about to write. And I would have never thought that I would feel any different about something like the Dutch service. After all, clearly any sane person would like to meet a smiling face at the post office, ready to help you send your package the most economic way when you say you would like to send it the cheapest route. In Amsterdam you are very likely get a response like, “No way of sending packages are cheap.” And yet, here I am, saying that I very well could prefer that.

I must explain myself.

I was flying international on an American airline a few weeks ago and was having problems with my in-seat entertainment system, as was my seatmate. He pressed the call button indicating that we needed assistance and the long wait began. The flight attendant proceeded to walk back and forth past out seats several times. I swear she looked at the call light each time she passed and then looked away quickly so she wouldn’t have to stop and ask us what we needed. This went on for between 10 – 15 minutes until she finally stopped by to if we had an issue (with an, “Oh, were you trying to get my attention???” DUH!)

I realized in that moment that, yes, it is true that the USA is a very service focused society, but for the first time I saw the insincerity of it. Yes, she was helping, but not because she had any interest in actually helping us, but more because she HAD to. In the Netherlands, they would just outright ignore you or straight out tell you they couldn’t help you, instead of pretending they didn’t see you.

And for the first time I feel like I actually prefer the Dutch way.

While in A’dam last week I had made reservations for 12 at a restaurant for dinner. I called back a few minutes later to change the reservation to 16. The woman on the line immediately screamed back with, “It’s impossible!!” It was then that I sighed with relief. I knew exactly what I was getting. There was no question about intention or sincerity. I was grateful to be back home in A’dam...

One would think that moving back home is a time of exciting rediscovery. Returning back home allows you to do all the things you can’t do when you live abroad: Like eat all the things you can’t get abroad (like cupcakes), catch up on TV shows you can’t get (like hours and hours of the Food Network), go to old haunts in your city, and experience all the day-to-day things you missed while you were gone (like good service). I guess I can’t visit any old haunts because I’m new to Boston, but all the other things that I would have thought I’d look forward to seem to fall oddly flat.

Perhaps what I’m going through is a natural cycle to repatriation. Because I gotta tell you, I feel now like I don’t belong here.

I feel like the US society today somehow isn’t a representation of who I am. I am not sure I can express myself clearly (even in my head) but I’ll try. It isn’t like the USA has changed while I was gone or that there is some fundamental change to the country – there might be, however that isn’t what I’m feeling. I sense that I’ve somehow lost a piece of myself (or my sense of myself?).

I’m not talking about anything regarding Amsterdam either. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I was one person when I left and now that I returned I am someone else. Not like I grew up (even though I did) or improved myself (which I also I did) – it is more like when I left I lost a part of my American self and picked up some other pieces. I have added new “worldly” attributes to my personality, if you can say that.

Now, I am no longer just an American. I fall into some other category. Perhaps the category of American-who-has-lived-abroad-in-Australia-and-The-Netherlands-and-has-returned-home. I’m not sure what that makes me.

But how I’m feeling right now is very uncomfortable.

People often ask me if I miss A’dam. I request that they ask me again in 6 months. Right now I’m just trying to make my way and it wouldn’t be fair to either Boston or A’dam if I said I liked one over the other or missed my old home. I just got to Boston and really don’t know how I feel.

I think what happens when you live internationally is that you take a little bit of each place with you, if that makes any sense. I have fond memories of some of the nicer aspects of living in Amsterdam, which I have brought back here with me (while I still religiously make fun of the negative things!!) and I incorporate those into my daily life back here. At the same time I try to cut out some of the more negative aspects of American society, and yes, there are a few.

I feel restless. This in-between stage I currently am in is not a place where I feel content. And I wonder, will I ever feel “normal”? Or do my experiences preclude me from feeling anywhere is “home” again?

One thing is for sure, I don’t know what I’m doing here.

Gay Pride in Boston

This last weekend was Gay Pride in Boston. I love attending Gay Pride. Everyone is just so happy! I make a point of going to it in whatever city I live in.

I was really looking forward to the parade here in Boston because the South End, where I live, is well known for the large number of homosexuals living here. I thought it would be *insane*, given the buildup with advertising, pre-weekend festivities, and the hanging of rainbow flag absolutely everywhere. Well, I wouldn't say I was disappointed, but after living in A'dam for years where the parade takes place on large boats going through the canals, I was a little surprised at how... well... TAME it was here.

Let's just do a quick comparison.

(I am in now way trying to dawg the Boston Gay Pride parade with this.)

Boston costumes

OR

Amsterdam costumes

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Boston Leather
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Woohoo, I *like* my A'dam leather!!

A'dam leather close-up. Delish!!
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Boston Prime Timers
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A'dam Oldies - with a whip!! Go get'em, girl!
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If we must have war:

Boston: Reminder to those who have died in combat
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If we must have war, I want this one!!
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Boston's Obama Pride
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A'dam's football pride

It is a hard choice to chose the better parade, I know. I am actually fine just seeing half naked guys, straight or gay.

I didn't get many others of the Boston Pride Parade, but here are some of A'dam Gay Pride highlights of 2007:

The A'dam pride crowd

A'dam has naked girls too

In Boston during this time of year, the smell of fresh flowers and rain hang heavy in the air. Each afternoon it seems like there is a violent thunderstorm which rocks the area, intensifying the scents even more. Years of rain in Amsterdam drove me crazy, but I don’t mind it here for some reason. It isn’t the kind of rain that causes the entire day to be overcast and dreary, it is more like an episode of a soap opera on TV, it is over as quick as it starts.

I love the weather. What is it now? Spring? Summer? I don’t know. Each day here is at least 22 degrees (72 F), which is a fabulous temperature, rain or shine. I can wear shorts on a regular basis for the first time in 3 years. Unfortunately, because I’ve lived in cold weather for 3 years, I don’t have any shorts anymore. I could care less, I just love the warm and mostly sunny weather.

I discovered my love for sparkling water while I lived in Amsterdam. I was overjoyed when I returned to find that you can find it in most places here, even convenience stores, but was more than underwhelmed by the prices ($2 for one liter!). I remembered back to when I was visiting a German friend for Oktoberfest last year, and saw he had a sparkling water maker at his house. I was so happy when I discovered the Soda Club in the USA, which sells the same sparkling water makers, and you can make your own sodas too. I think that is a little dorky, but I’m just happy to make my own sparking water. The starter kit has the machine, the bottles, 1 CO2 cartridge, and a ton of soda flavors for $99. I almost have already spent that much on sparkling water from the stores since moving here in March! Well worth it, and a much more green option too.

I’ve almost gotten my new place furnished, so I am beginning to be more settled here in Boston. It still doesn’t feel like home, but it is starting to feel more homey. More updates as is becomes real.

I would like to take an African safari. Anyone have any info on those?

Well, it has been a while since I last wrote. I have a lot on my mind, but I think that I’m very clear, and muddled, about where I am and where I’m going, which may contribute to me not blogging.

I am currently flying to Hong Kong and then on to China, and Australia for a total of three weeks. I am a bit overwhelmed by all the travel I have upcoming (but it should make for some good stories!), which I think is playing a role in where my head is at. I’m really excited about seeing a bunch of people I haven’t seen in a long time – old Chinese and American friends in China, the girls in Australia, and Dan my old boss in Oz, etc – but flying around the world in three weeks is a bit much. Especially when I have a bunch of travel coming up for the rest of the year – 2 weeks in Amsterdam, a week in Mexico and Brazil, and a week in Bahrain. This is the beginning of the home stretch of the year for me and I’m already feeling tired just thinking about it. And that is just what is planned now. Whew.

At the same time, I’m pondering what I’m doing. I have been living back in the USA since the end of March and I have been frantically busy since my return. I have been on the road a lot, probably 60% or more, and then pile all the extras that have gone with this move on top of that – finding a place to live, buying all new furniture, and having to get a car (which I *still* haven’t been successful at yet). I am feeling overwhelmed with everything going on since I moved back, self imposed and work related.

And now I feel like I want to start dating. But who can fit in date with this much going on? It seems like the singles market is ripe in Boston. I’ve read a lot of articles which claim that Boston is one of the best cities to be in if you are single, however nothing indicates that these odds apply to wonderful, attractive, passionate, career-minded thirty-somethings. We will see.

One thing that has gone surprisingly well which I didn’t expect so quickly is I have found a great group of expats that live here. I met a great British guy who has introduced me to literally hundreds of people from all walks of life and cultures. That has been a godsend. Without that I would still be wondering what the hell I’m doing back in this country. (And that sentiment will be magnified 100 percent if McCain and the Alaskan gun-slinging lack-of-experience city-of-100-people mayor mama get elected. I will promptly be moving to Canada. But I digress). Nick, if you are reading this, I owe you for a great deal of my happiness in Boston, so thanks, babe!

But my main thought right now is how do I slow down long enough to enjoy what is happening and make sure I’m living in the moment – right here and now – instead of worrying about all the overwhelming amount of work I need to complete over the upcoming months. This is something I am not very successful at doing. (Are any of us?)

So, my thoughts are focused around taking some time to think about what works for me and what doesn’t. Taking time to get to know my new city. Taking time to get out and date some interesting guys. And taking some time to find my next big thing. It is out there… I can feel it… but I can’t see it. Is all that too much to ask? I am now opening myself up to the universe for assistance.

Dawn - The Pilot

On my flight back to the USA from Australia I sat in the hump on a Boeing 747. Before we took off, I went to the toilet, which is located right near the cockpit on this aircraft. I poked my head in to say hello and they invited me to take a quick look around.

Apparently there are at least two of every button, and in some cases up to 4. Nice to know there are several backups! One of the pilots also mentioned that if one of the four engines were to go out we wouldn’t even know it in the back.

All the buttons

Upstairs in a 747

Luckily, we landed safely in the USA after 13 hours in the air. No backups needed, I hope.

Tiny needles I left in for several days

US Airways is cheap. And I don’t mean cool, inexpensive cheap, I mean cheap cheap, like Southwest Airlines or JetBlue. I am flying right now and did not realize that they have unfortunately gone the way of the low cost airlines who charge for absolutely everything, even water. I usually fly United Airlines, but in order to get a reasonable flight from Boston to Orlando (and by reasonable I mean less than $500) I decided to take fly of their partners. I don’t think I’ll be flying them again the foreseeable future. Luckily, most of my flying isn’t domestic, so this isn’t a huge concern.

But that isn’t what this entry is about.

I have a new favorite thing. And yes, it is one of those woowoo, tree hugging, spiritual activities, and I won’t make any excuses for that. I will just tell you, in my logical ESTJ way, why I’m hooked. You can think what you like.

I am a new fan of acupuncture. I have only gotten acupuncture one other time in this lifetime a few years ago I was having problems with one of my hips. It would begin to ache if I walked too long, and I’d have to sit down for a good while to let it recover before moving on. This became quite an ordeal living in A’dam where people walk absolutely everywhere. (But it did mean that I enjoyed the relaxing café lifestyle quite a bit.)

I went to a several doctors and no one could find any reason I was having these issues with my hip. As a last result I went to the acupuncturist not really expecting any real positive result. I received one treatment where he put a few needles in my hip for 20 minutes. All I can say is that I never have had the hip pain again, and that was over 2 years ago.

That experience, even though it was quite significant and changed my daily life, didn’t make me a convert. I never thought I had any reason to go back to an acupuncturist.

But when I was in A’dam a few weeks ago and I was deathly ill with a cold/flu, I felt like I’d give it another try when I just couldn’t knock my sickness. I was thinking about going to the normal doctor, but I figured they just tell me to eat more brown bread, so I decided to try the acupuncturist.

She was a likable enough character, looked very bohemian, was about my age, with an almost British accent which I take is from living with her Irish partner. I explained to her that I had a lot of congestion and had to get a on a plane the next day and didn’t want my head to explode, and could she do anything about that? And, while she was at it, I’ve been experiencing some insomnia and general anxiety from lack of sleep.

And then the needles went in – 4 or 5 in the crown on my head, 1 in my forehead, and about 5 in each arm and the same in each leg/foot. I laid there for about 30 minutes and then she said I should go home and surround myself with feelings of calmness and relaxation.

I promptly went to happy hour.

I may have written here that I cannot sleep on planes. And you might know by now that I fly internationally a lot and take plenty of red eyes to get to different locations. So not being able to sleep on planes can be quite an issue.

Well, the next day I got on a Lufthansa flight (EXCELLENT service, food, and seat recline!) to fly back to the USA, and instantly fell asleep. I know this might not sound like a big deal to you, but it was HUGE for me. It is probably the first time in 5 years that I’ve slept on a plane for any great length of time. I was in shock when I woke up. I decided that I really had to watch a movie (what a normally do all during flights) in order to make sure I’d be able to sleep when I got home that evening.

I watched about half of the movie and could not keep my eyes open!! I went back to sleep for a few more hours.

I was certain that my napping on the daytime flight would negatively affect my sleep that evening, especially given the insomnia I’d been experiencing. Each night I would get into bed and think about HOW to fall asleep, and lay awake for hours counting sheep or looking at the patterns my ceiling. But that evening I fell straight to sleep.

And I’ve slept every night since then. In fact, nighttime rolls around and I cannot keep my eyes open. And the only thing that has changed is the acupuncture. I don’t see any other logical explanation. I still travel a lot, have quite a bit of stress, and have a busy job. So, the result has been most surprising and wonderful. All I can do is smile!

I don’t know if acupuncture treatments “build” on each other, but I will be going back – soon. And I’m a convert. I heart acupuncture!

I am not traveling, and therefore my blog suffers. I don’t usually write unless I’m on the road and something unbelievably exciting is going on.

I only have one trip to DC scheduled before the end of the year. Not traveling is a blessing and a curse. I’ve been begging not to travel and now that it is finally here I miss it, kind of how you miss a wart or a chip in your teeth. Now it means I have to get to know my new city, Boston, and all the new people in it.

At least it is pretty here with the autumn leaves cover the sidewalks like blankets. The leaves look like art, with the rust reds, the golden yellows and every shade of brown displayed. Even to my uncreative mind it is inspirational.

I went to an acupuncturist here locally yesterday. He is a slight Chinese man, not as tall as me, and with a heavy Chinese accent. Before sticking me full of needles, he checked my pulse and got a slightly confused look.

“You have weak pulse!” he said, “I give you special tea.” And then he added, “It tastes very bad!”

I’m not sure what all that pulse stuff means, but I’m pretty sure it means I am dying. He acupunctured me, and then came back with the tea.

“You come immediately on Monday! You come in 2 times a week until pulse better!”

Clearly he doesn’t understand that I am responsible for 6 hours straight of conference calls, um, pretty much every day, so Monday didn’t work. I go back on Tuesday.

“Special tea” costs $30 and when brewed smells like bong water and has an after taste of rancid Cream of Wheat. Very odd.

But hopefully I’ll be better soon, cured of whatever it is I have. I better be close to death having to drink all awful tea.

Today is our Christmas event at work. I know, I know, it is in November and before Thanksgiving even. I don't plan these things.

I am in charge of the music. This morning I diligently put my Bose iPod speaker system into a bag and packed an outfit for tonight. I then got in the car and drove 40 minutes to work before I realized that I did not bring my iPod. Damn!

Given that today is the Christmas event I took a little extra time to make myself pretty. I was just about to dry my hair when I dropped the hairdryer into the toilet. No, it was not on. But now I look like a homeless person because I could not dry my hair. Double Damn!

I called my dad to ask him what to do about the hair dryer. He told me to shake it profusely and then put it into the refrigerator. While that makes no sense to me, I promptly did so.

So, my iPod is at home, and my hairdryer is in the refrigerator. And I am at work.

Tune in tomorrow to find out if my hairdryer is broken. Or if I’m dead.

A few days ago I heard about the Burger King Flame, a new "scent" by Burger King that smells like the whopper. At first, I thought that it was a bit silly, and gross even. But in the end the power of suggestion overtook me. Yesterday, all I did was crave a Whopper from BK! I even looked online to see if there was a store near me so I could go eat one. There wasn't, so I was forced to go to McDonald's instead - I am sure they didn't have that in mind, me going to the competitor to eat, when they started this marketing campaign.

With a tagline like this, who can resist? - "Behold the scent of seduction, with a hint of flame broiled meat."

I will tell you one thing - tomorrow at the airport I am so eating a Whopper. That, and the naked Burger King character is dead sexy.

My street during first snow and me in my hip UNIGLO purple parka!

Just so you know, I cannot find a Burger King in the Chicago airport. I heard there is one in terminal 3, but I am in terminal C and those don’t sound close by each other. If an airport has terminals with letters AND numbers then there are way too many terminals in said airport.

I got up at the ungodly hour of 4:30AM this morning to catch a 6:30AM flight that sat on the tarmac for 1.5 hours before taking off. Of course, this was after almost missing the flight because it was damn near impossible to catch a taxi this morning. Some of you might not know that we got our first “real” snow yesterday, and I changed my flight to today so I wouldn’t have to go through the stress having flights cancelled or missed.

I thought that was a good idea right up until I saw the taxi situation. Just when I’d given up all hope of actually catching the flight, the cab driver showed up like my knight in shining armor and wisked me off to the airport. I felt fleetingly better until I got to the airport and saw the lines for security. Geez, I should have known better, but I momentarily lost my mind and thought they’d be short during the holiday season for some strange reason!

I’ll say this about sitting on tarmacs. I am a-okay with that. I’d rather sit on the tarmac relaxing than hanging out for hours in some busy airport at Christmastime. That, and I’d rather make it in one piece and give them the time they need to deice that plane. A-Okay.

See ya’ll in Texas!

Airplanes covered in snow in Boston

This is the second time that I’ve attempted to fly out of Boston during the winter, and the second time I’ve had problems getting out due to the weather. One word: Annoying.

The first time I was trying to fly to Houston for Christmas, and had arrangements with friends in Austin that evening. I had a timed plan to fly into Houston, drive to Austin, change and shower, and then meet friends at 8pm. I was supposed to arrive at 2pm, and I would have had plenty of time to do everything with time to spare. If the plane hadn’t been delayed 6 houors! I ended up in Austin exhausted, lackluster, and irritated at 11pm. But I still went out! ;-)

They shovel snow into this machine and it creates steam - very ingenious!

Today I am flying to Orlando and this evening I have scheduled a meeting at 6:30pm. Yesterday when I heard we were having a big snowstorm I diligently called the airlines and made preparations (with US Airways again, YUCK!) to fly earlier in the morning, hoping there would be no problems if I flew out earlier.

I woke up early (putting a cramp on my active social life!) and got a cab to the airport. We boarded right on time and all looked well for an on-time departure. And then we sat there, waiting to deice. And then we deiced. We waited. And then they closed the airport.

Needless to say, I ran up to the gate just in time to watch my connection pull out, so I missed my flight out of DC. So now I sit , aggravated at having to wait here another 3 hours, and possibly (read probably) miss my meeting tonight in Orlando. Which I’m supposed to run.

I’ve never lived in a place where you have to adjust your schedule for the weather. Growing up in Texas, you have to get used to having glorious weather every day. Tough life. In Sydney, same thing. In Amsterdam, you have to decide if you are going to wear a rain suit or not. (In my case, mostly NOT, they are decidedly unfashionable!)

But in Boston I have to think about my hours of scheduled conference calls in the morning and when they are going to start, and what time I will have to leave to make it into the office on time. And now, whenever I have a flight, I have to worry about the snow and if I’ll have problems getting to my destination.

And there are other hazards as well! The other day I went out to dinner and came out and immediately fell straight on my ass, nearly breaking my elbow. It was so icy that I couldn’t walk on the sidewalk or the street, and I ended up walking in the plowed snow leaning up against the cars. It was very dangerous! And this was wearing my awesome new Bog snow boots. (I bought them for 50% off and I am very pleased!!)

While I’m tired of waking up early to account for weather, I love the softness, silence and beauty the snow brings. I wish I wasn’t going to be in Florida this week missing it. Happy Sunday, my friends!

We are *so excited* you are here!

And we will celebrate with lots of these!!:

The final product

This weekend it was cold and the snow came down all day on Saturday. Sunday I went out with my friend Dereck and played in it. We went over to Harvard Square and found a park to make the perfect snow angel.

Here is me walking over to the perfect expanse of unadulterated snow:

And checking it all out. Notice that my pants are rolled up over 6 inches and they are reaching the snow:

And then I went for it:

Next time I decide to roll around in cold, wet snow I will make sure to wear something WATERPROOF! I mean, seriously! Who doesn't know that snow makes you really wet?

And the finished product. Yay!!

A smile - that's all it takes

I read an article the other day about luck. And how you can make your own luck based on your attitude.

The article did an experiment where they took a self proclaimed lucky guy and a self proclaimed unlucky girl and put them in the same circumstance to see how each of them dealt with the situation and what was different.

They sent them to a restaurant where they had taped a $5 bill on the sidewalk outside and then inside seated at the bar was a “millionaire”. Everyone in the restaurant was in on the experiment.

As they walked into the restaurant, the lucky guy saw the bill and picked it up, and then immediately walked in and sat next to the millionaire and struck up a conversation. He walked out with a possible business deal. The woman walked in, didn’t even see the bill, and didn’t speak to anyone the entire time she was in the restaurant.

They asked each to comment on their day. The woman said nothing interesting happened. The man said he was lucky, he found $5 and has a possible business deal with a millionaire.

They explained the difference between the two was that the guy was present or in the moment, and seeing everything as an opportunity. They suggested things like striking up conversations with people on the street or who you sit next to on the plane. And the article said the #1 thing to do to create opportunities is to smile.

Just smile.

All of this made me think. I actually do think of myself as very lucky. Good things always seem to happen to me. I do think that my positive attitude about life plays into this, and that you create the things that happen to you. I believe that you make the choice in every reaction, what makes you upset, and that you can choose to see everything as an opportunity. Usually I feel like this.

Recently though, for ummmmmm… at least the last 3 years, I’ve been really really really really busy with work. I don’t take a moment to look around and appreciate what is around me. I don’t take the time to enjoy life. I’m always in a rush. I’m rude when I don’t mean to be. I am rarely in the present moment. I’ve decided to put being present on my list of goals for the year. (Yes, I write goals every, single year, and you know what, I truly believe that because I write them, they generally come true, just because of my written intention.)

And the first step to the new Dawn was tonight. I decided to do an experiment. As I was walking to a restaurant to meet a friend for dinner I decided to smile at each person I passed. Now this is very different from the normal me. Usually I am looking at my feet and walking as fast as they will take me, not giving any mind to others. I generally walk with a mission! So I was surprised that many people looked at me as they passed. I was even more surprised when most of them smiled back. I felt instant gratification! I loved it. And so I can tell that even this small step has made a big difference in my feeling present. And so I plan on doing the experiment again tomorrow and for each day after that as well! Who knew that something so smile could be so fulfilling?

I will say, though, that my smile worked a little too well because a homeless guy tried to hug me!

Facebook has this lame thing right now where people write 25 random things about themselves and tag other people so they will tell you 25 random things about themselves as well. And even though normally wouldn’t fill out something I think is lame, for some reason this totally resonated with me. I feel like I never take the time to slow down to think (too much work, #17), and this seemed like a very nice first step. I posted this list on my facebook and now it is here too.

1. I love to read everything and anything. My favorite book right now is The Time Traveler’s Wife. I’ve read it numerous times and I cry every time (I seriously cannot help myself.). I am currently reading A New Earth (Tolle) and The Blind Watchmaker (Dawkins).
2. ESTJ.
3. I have visited every continent except one. Which one have I not visited?
4. I love food. Period. Many of my happiest memories involve good food and good friends.
5. My friends are hugely important to me and I see them as my family. I truly feel like I have the best friends in the entire world (thanks you guys!!)
6. I make New Year’s resolutions every year and most of them come true. I truly believe that just by writing them down that they come true. You know, being in your consciousness all year round, and all.
7. I am generally lucky. The first time I paid bingo I won $500.
8. Nature makes me joyous and happy. I like small things like fallen autumn leaves or looking at snow covered mountaintops on a crisp, clear day.
9. 2009 will be the best year of my life so far. I’m at a crossroads, and I’m choosing wisely.
10. My favorite three places on earth, so far, are China, Egypt and Greece. I cannot wait to get to India and go on a safari in Africa (I hate you, Dan :-P ), both of which I intend to do soon.
11. Music rules me. It has the ability to pull me up or bring me down. I am always looking for more music.
12. I played clarinet in high school and was the flag corp captain my senior year. I think that probably makes me pretty dorky.
13. I am a cat person.
14. I like to have a clean windshield and clean mirrors. I feel like they are a reflection of your soul.
15. I love lighting lots of candles all over the house. Somehow they make me feel calm.
16. I sometimes (okay, MANY times) cry during movies. I love that and wouldn’t change it. It is one of the things that reminds me I’m human.
17. I work way too much and plan to incorporate more balance into my life starting right this minute!
18. I believe that you can influence the direction your life takes just by thinking about what you want. When you tell the universe what you want those things come to you. Thoughts become things, so think wisely!!
19. I am passionate about everything and anything I do. I think life is exciting!
20. I once took dance lessons as a way get over a guy. In return I got a new boyfriend, and I can now dance swing and salsa pretty darn good.
21. I try not to regret anything in life. I choose to see challenges as some sort of opportunity to learn a life lesson.
22. I think about my granddad a lot, and many times feel he is watching over me. He used to help me cheat during Easter egg hunts. I still smile when I think of him. 
23. I flew over 100k miles in 2008. Even with that, I still get a feeling of delight when I watch planes take off. To me, it spells adventure!
24. I keep moving farther and farther north. Now I live in Boston where it is bitterly cold but I refuse to complain because even with the cold it is clear and sunny. Unlike Amsterdam where it rained every day and made me crazy!
25. I don’t usually take the time to do things like this, but for some reason it felt important for me to take the time to do this one.

About two weeks ago I met a cute guy who was hanging out with my friends at a bar we frequent. I assumed since they were all talking together that they knew this guy pretty well, especially when they knew that he lived on my street. I took that opportunity to speak to him and see if he was as interesting as he was attractive. We talked for a while about our neighborhood, street, and flats, as well as other small inconsequential get-to-know-you conversation. After an hour or so he got my number and a while later I left with another friend of mine and walked home.

At around 2am that night he rang my buzzer. I ignored it, but immediately felt that it was quite an odd twist in events. What was he thinking? That I’d answer the door in the middle of the night with open arms and want to screw with him? I mean, seriously? Am I the only one around who finds that a complete turn off? Don’t people usually have some history before they start having booty calls? I cannot imagine what signal I gave off that said that this was okay behavior. I ignored him.

I thought it odd but put it out of my mind because he didn’t call, which was good because I didn’t want to have to deal with telling him what a prick I thought he was. But this last Thursday, my buzzer went off at 3am. Now, not only was a completely annoyed at having again been woken up in the middle of the night, but I thought it was totally inappropriate and creepy. I again ignored him.

This is now doubly weird. I didn’t answer the week before and he somehow things that after another week has gone by that I’ll answer and want to see him. The guy is off his rocker.

I talked to my friends to find out what they knew about him. Ends up they don’t know him well at all and were all very disturbed to learn that he was acting like a freak. We started thinking up ideas of how to casually suggest to the guy that this was not fitting behavior. One friend suggested that a bunch of the guys go over to his house in the middle of the night and ring his buzzer. When he answers, they will go and shove his head in the toilet and ask if he got the message. I think I might just take them up on that.

Oh, and he better watch out. The next time he sees me he is going to have to deal with the wrath of Dawn.

Please tell me this isn’t the normal dating scene of 2009.

I am thinking of renaming this blog “The Adventures of Dating in your mid-30s” (okay… late 30s, but who’s counting?). I thought that if a guy asks you out on several dates, that you could assume that they were actually available. I’ll know better next time!

For the last few weeks I’ve been going out with this guy. We’ve been having a good time and getting along just great. I noticed after some time that he didn’t seem available on the weekends. This wasn’t easy to figure out because I have been on the road and not around much on the weekends either. But this last weekend when I asked him out, he said he was going out for a bike ride and couldn’t see me. My response, “You are going for a bike ride ALL weekend?”

I started to put together that there was something a little strange about that, and perhaps there was more to the story than I knew. So, I asked him if he had a girlfriend. Even with a direct question, I couldn’t get a direct answer, but when you put two + two together, you come to the same conclusion.

Dating these days is harder than it used to be. Now we have the phone (which no one actually uses), emails (3 different accounts at the very least), Facebook (when he didn’t accept my friend request that should have clued me in), and texting (which is totally confusing and impersonal). With all these options, it is amazing that anyone even gets to the point of actually going out on a date.

So, now I know. Before going out with someone I first need to ask if they are married or in a committed relationship. Whew, glad to get that lesson outta the way relatively unscathed. Anything else I need to know?

I usually tell the taxis to stop at the house with the tree in front. Since I went to Amsterdam last week Spring has definitely sprung and there are green leafy trees or flowering buds everywhere in Boston. There was a tree explosion in one week.

Our gang

Amsterdam was wonderful last week. I caught up with some of my dear A’dam friends and celebrated Queen Juliana’s birthday with over 1 million other people. I was busy from day to night and saw parts of Amsterdam that I never knew existed in the 3 years I lived there. It was truly a wonderful time.

Queen's Day canals, all dressed up in orange

But I can’t help but wonder… is this it? Is this what my life is going to be? Here I am, a 30-something woman who is ambitious, very driven and career minded. I make decent money, get to fly all over the world (and have turned into quite the travel diva) and see places many people only dream of, and yet I still want more.

I cannot tell you how many times people tell me they want my job. And they are right!! I feel like I do kind of have the world’s perfect job. I have always wanted to travel and now I get PAID to do it. I create my own schedule, work from home in my pajamas, and get to work with people all over the world, learning new cultures. I truly love it.

On the flip side, though, do you really want to be on 15 hours flights with awful food, sitting next to a smelly person who won’t shut up? Or have to travel for 2 days to get to a somewhere only to travel back home 2 days later, and it take you an entire week to do only two days work in some international city? Or come home on the weekend and have just enough time to do laundry and turn back around and fly back out again on Monday (or even worse, Sunday)? Or not be able to see your friends because you are so jetlagged from being on the road that all you want to do is sleep?

That’s my life.

I keep thinking, I’d like to have more. I’d like to have a cat. I’d like to have enough energy to have a relationship (or even to date)! I’d like to be home long enough to have a fridge full of food and make dinner for friends or a loved one. I’d like to have kids. I’d like to visit the local museums.

So, yes, I should not complain and I am so very grateful for what I do have. But, honestly, I’d give all this up to have a happy relationship and maybe even a couple of munchkins. Funny how the grass is always greener, isn’t it?

I had a dream last night that a guy I dated during college was now dating a "little person" who had it out for me. She was like a bulldog and would not quit coming after me. Very odd.

What do you think it means?

Dad's "Church"

I’m traveling to good ol’ Tejas this weekend to partake in my dad’s 70th birthday festivities. I am currently sitting on a plane, cursing the 7.5 hours of travel time it takes to get from Boston to Houston. How is it possible to get to Europe in less than 7 hours and I can’t get to Houston in that long?

Originally, I was going to buy him a gravestone for his present. Not for him, silly, for his barn! My dad is one of those eccentric British people who built a folly for a barn, which is the shape of a church. I’ll give just a little bit of background on this… My father grew up in Ipswich, England and as a child I was forever driving with my parents around the British countryside in search of finding buildings that were made to look like something they weren’t. Like what looks like a water tower with a house on top. Or a house that looked like a tower.

My parents have some land in the middle of Texas, in Fayetteville to be exact, and on it they have built a cabin overlooking a pond, a garage apartment, a house, and a barn. But the barn looks like a church. It is actually quite convincing. To the point where people will drive up to it and ask what denomination it is. Clearly those people have never met my father before. He is a true non-believer.


From this angle you can see the big tractor doors

To further decorate his “church”, I thought it should have some gravestones. I’ve done a little bit of looking and you would not believe how expensive they are! I kept thinking that I could just get one that they had messed up (you know, spelled incorrectly or something), but those apparently don’t exist. They just sand it down and start over.

That went out the window anyway when my father wrote me an email and requested a “Walkman” for his birthday. A walkman? Really? One of those things from the 80’s that plays tapes? No, he says, one that has digital music, and he would like the music already loaded, thank you very much.

I spent a lot of time deciding what to get him. He had very exact specifications – he did not want one with a big screen because he wants to use it while he is mowing and might break it (did he plan on using his noise reducing headphones to save his ears?, I asked), didn’t want one that was too expensive (as he might run over it with his tractor!), etc etc.

I decided to go ahead and get him an iPod even though he clearly did not want one so expensive. I decided quality was more important for the old man. I got him the 16GB Nano. He doesn’t know it yet, but I am sure he will want to put all his pictures on there to show around. I called him from the Apple Store. What color do you want? There is Red, Pink, Blue, Purple, Green, Orange, Yellow, Silver and Black. I thought for sure he would want to go with the Silver or the Black, after all, the man IS 70. His response, “Did you say Yellow? I’ll take yellow.” Really? Geez, how hip is my dad? I proceeded to tell him so, and then he ruined it for me. “So I can see it if I drop it in the grass.” Oh.

Over the last few weeks I’ve been carefully crafting out how I will get the music on, what I will need to do, stealing as much classical music as I can find and loading it onto the iPod. I have been thinking about how I will spend an evening with him installing and setting up iTunes, showing him how to download music with the iTunes gift cards, showing him how to attach and sync his iPod, setting up playlists, etc, etc. I have everything planned out perfectly. And tonight is the night. Tomorrow we will be preparing for his party and cooking all day, so tonight would be a good time to get that all sorted out.

This morning I woke up and had an email from United Airlines. My flight was going to leave on time at 11:24AM. WHAT? 11:24AM? I thought it was at 1:04PM. Reconfirming my itinerary did in fact reveal that my flight LANDS in Chicago at 1:04PM. OH NO! My relaxing morning ritual quickly turned into a quick cancellation of meetings and running around like a chicken trying to get everything finished and packed in time. I wasn’t even planning to leave my house until after 11:30AM!!

But I made it just in the nick of time. When I got to the airport and strolled up to the gate they just started to board. It was easy for me to keep on walking and go straight to my seat 1A. I sat down and got situated, relaxing over a cool beverage and waiting to take off.

All was well in my world. My carefully laid plans would come to fruition with no issues at all.

And then I remembered that I left his iPod on the table. Right where I had carefully placed it so I wouldn’t forget it.

Dammit.

Yesterday the strangest thing happened to me.

I was waiting for a friend outside his house and I saw a nearby bird perched on a fence. I decided to go over and take a closer look because I found it odd that it was just sitting there and not moving at all, even though I was fairly close. I walked over and looked at it and it still didn’t move, which I really found strange. It just stayed there, eyes closed, not even noticing me. I saw it was a Blue Jay and wondered if it was a baby or something because I couldn’t figure out why it wasn’t afraid of me.

Soon after, there was a swooshing of a bird near my head (as a warning) and a Blue Jay to the other bird and started feeding it. Ah, it is a baby. Makes sense now. I was fascinated by nature – watching what appeared to be the father bird feeding the baby bird. It would feed it something, the baby would drop it, and the father bird would swoosh down to the ground and pick it back up again and take it to feed the baby, when the baby would drop it again.

This happened over and over and I was standing there watching it all unfold. Suddenly, something very sharp hit me very, very hard in the head. I was completely stunned and started rubbing my head because it hurt. From across the street a man asked me if I was okay. I said I was, but asked what had hit me. He said it was another Blue Jay that attacked me.

I was completely shocked and discombobulated and he kept asking me if I was okay or not. I said I was fine, but I would go into my friend’s house and check my head.

I rang the bell, and he buzzed me in, and as if right on cue, blood started running down my face. I was completely shocked. My head was pounding and I was in shock and trying to get up the stairs. I was wiping the blood off, but it started gushing out at an alarming speed and was dripping all over my shirt and on the floor.

When I got to my friend’s house he asked if I was okay because he could hear the guy outside talking to me. I said that I was attacked by a bird and then he walked around the corner to see blood gushing down my face and exclaimed, “Oh my god!!!”

He gathered some towels for me and I asked him to try and see where the wound was so I could apply pressure to stop the bleeding. He told me that my hair was completely matted with blood and that there was no way to see where the injury was without me washing my hair. A few minutes had gone by and the blood was no longer flowing down my face, so I decided to wash out my hair, which filled the entire bathtub with blood.

He examined my head to find that the cut was… wait for it… miniscule. I cannot believe that such a small cut could create such a huge amount of blood. I have never bled like that before and was a bit freaked out, honestly. We put some antiseptic on it and cleaned it up and went on with the day.

It was like this, but worse!

But now I’ve decided that when I walk around outside I will wear a hard hat and carry a shotgun for good measure.

Whose foot is that?

You must read on and all will be revealed.

I’ve been busy since going to Romania… worked in Amsterdam and DC for a week each, and have been hanging out in Boston trying to get a bunch of programs rolled out before going on vacation (which I am on now). I’ve been a bit stressed and nothing terribly exciting has been going on that warranted a blog entry.

I am now living the good life on vacation in California. This is the view of all the boats from where I’m staying in Marina Del Ray.

And here I am sailing (2 days in a row now!)

But that’s not why I’m writing…

Let’s figure out whose foot that is. About a month ago, I went to a dinner at Banq for a friend’s birthday. I was coming back from the facilities when I looked over at a table and saw Ben Affleck. I thought, “Oh, there’s Ben Affleck…” I wasn’t very exciting because I’m not a real fan of Ben’s, but I kept looking because it didn’t quite look like him. Now let me just say – I’m not the kind of person who does a lot of people watching and I pretty much never notice when there is anyone famous around. You can imagine that this was an unusual moment for me. But I really wasn’t excited because Ben doesn’t do it for me.

But as I looked closer, I realized that while it looked like Ben, it wasn’t. It was actually Ron Livingston. RON LIVINGSTON!!! From Office Space! Burger! Band of Brothers!!! I have had a super crush on him since I saw him in Office Space. That movie was an exact replica of my life at the time (kicking the shit out of the fax machine, not stealing money or kissing Jennifer Aniston) and really resonated with me. I was psyched to actually see my hero from the movie.

He saw me looking at him, and so here we are… me watching him, him watching me watch him and instead of heading back to my seat with my back to him, I move to the other side of the table so I can look at him. He’s realized that I’ve realized who he is and I begin to get super excited.

To me, this wasn’t just a celebrity… it was RON LIVINGSTON, my hero! I don’t usually get star struck (after all, I usually don’t even notice celebrities because I am not paying enough attention), but I’m seriously pumped to see Ron. My mind is going a mile a minute about what I will or won’t do about this situation. I watch them eat while furiously texting all my friends.

He is sitting there with 3 other people, so all together two guys and two gals. When the girls both go to the to toilet, I couldn’t hold back, even though I had decided in my head I wasn’t going to do anything. I had to head over to say something, even though I really should let the poor guy eat in peace. But I just couldn’t. And this, ladies and gentleman, is what I said to the man in my most glorious and shining moment.

Dawn: “I’m not going to say anything….. but I am a HUGE fan.”

I’m not going to say anything? Really? That is what I’m going to say to the guy? Really?

He was very gracious in my moment of idiocy though, and said, “Thank you very much.” I had enough wits around me to turn around in my seat and be absolutely mortified in my dessert. What a loser thing to say to someone you are huge fan of.

A few moments later he got up and walked out. I’ll just mention this because it bugged me. He had on a button down shirt tucked into jeans with nice shoes – WITHOUT A BELT! Need I remind him that he is a MOVIE STAR? I’m no queen of fashion, but I at least know to wear a belt when tucking in anything. That was disappointing, but didn’t ruin my excitement.

Someone above is watching me and thinking I need some celebrity sightings, because then just a few weeks after that I was at a sushi restaurant called Duozo in Boston where I saw another famous character.

I was sitting at the bar waiting for a table when I saw someone walk in the door. He started bouncing and dancing to the music and, forgive me, my first thought was ‘look at that loser dancing’ – No judgments here! When he walked in and I could fully see him I realized that it looked like David Spade in a goofy trucker hat. I thought, ‘Nah, probably not him’, but then this glamazon followed him in who was about 13 feet tall, weighed about 80 lbs, and was about 21 years old. Need I remind you that David Spade is about 4 feet tall? Only David Spade would have a woman looking like that with him. While I sat waiting for a table, they were immediately whisked off to their table.

Now seriously, these things don’t usually phase me, but to have *three* brushes with fame in a matter of weeks is just too much. And though I really love Ron Livingston, I think this one is most exciting.

While waiting at the airport to board my flight to California on Friday, I am looking around and there is this woman standing near me in line and I keep thinking that she is a movie star but I cannot for the life of me place her. It was right on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn’t figure it out.

When I board and sit down, the guy next to me says, “Do you know you are sitting right in front of the woman from the movie Airplane?” Ah hah!!! That is it! No kidding, Julie Hagerty is sitting right behind me. When we take off, I notice that there is a dog right behind me, so I turn around and CASUALLY strike up a conversation with her and her husband. (uh huh, yeaaaaahhhh…. right, casually!) Her dog’s name is Howard and he likes to eat airplane dinners.

She doesn’t look like she has aged one day – she looks exactly the same as she did in the movie. And she has that same squeaky voice that she had in the movie as well. But she is very, very nice and kind. Definitely a gracious movie star.

So, whose foot is that? Julie Hagerty, of course. That is as close I got to getting a picture with her. Right before I asked her if she could speak jive.

sit in park like old woman
enjoying the sun
waiting for the perfect man